i hope all this is just a dream and that when i wake up tomorrow all the problems will be solved. i know people are taking far more chaaps in life and they have good reasons to do so and that mine are very feeble compared to them but still i m very much under pressure. i still cant decide what i want to do or what i should do. the advantages and disadvantages are canceling each other mostly. everything is so messed up right now. i have never taken such a great decision in my 18 years so i m very frightened. in this world of competition, i have to take the right steps coz i m nothing exceptional so i have to flourish based on hard work and right decisions. the colleges or univ i wud choose will affect me very much. i have never given an interview either. only if i had got selected in isi or cmi or iit, all this jhamela wouldn't have been there. but i had tried hard. but people are more talented and experienced. i wish my desires were less complicated or easier to achieve. like engg.
nobody is making it clear to me.
i cant concentrate...those thoughts are constantly disturbing me. if someone asks me something face to face from studies, i get tensed and mess it up all. i know it alright most of the time but my problem is NERVES. i m more like ron weasley than harry. harry is very brave and confident.i think i cant study anymore today. i m feeling very scared and tensed. i hope everything goes alright tomorrow and that i get what is best for me.
i hope this ends soon.